Posted by Margaret Daisley
When I saw the words “The Apprentice” in the e-newsletter Chief Marketer recently, I had to read on. Sure, I have my reservations about The Donald like everyone else. (That hair! The constant name-dropping – of his own name!). But c’mon, admit it! He’s certainly more entertaining and even educational than, for instance, Paris Hilton. And I find it rather fascinating to watch the Darwinian experience each week in which two groups compete in a quick and contrived marketing task, knowing that one of them will be fired. Oh that Donald! He always picks the right one.
The Chief Marketer piece was by Drew Neisser of the Renegade Marketing Group in New York. Neisser writes that “Our nondisclosure agreement with [The Apprentice’s] producers prevents me from providing specific details of our involvement. But that said, it’s public record that two of us made cameo appearances (on Episode 2, Season 5, in which the “oh-so-easy-to-despise Brent” led his “doomed team” straight to failure). However, Mr. Neisser’s and his companion’s appearances were so short, he says, that even his mother missed him on the show.
In any case, it has occurred to me, as it has to Mr. Neisser, “that there are lessons to be found in the rubble, gems of marketing wisdom buried amid this primetime detritus.” Mr. Neisser examines the task of Episode 2, Season 5: convincing consumers to send a specific text message. As he notes, in The Apprentice task, “there was no reasonable exchange of value with the consumer. Unsuspecting pedestrians were asked to send a text message without a promise of anything in return. In fact, they simply got a wordy reply that referenced the Gillette Fusion (the company/brand being promoted that week).” “In marketing reality,” Neisser summarizes, “most companies try to build meaningful relationships with target prospects. Recognizing that the ‘experience’ can define the brand, more and more marketers are examining every aspect of their consumer interactions and are working hard to make them as enjoyable and rewarding as possible.” He goes on, but you get the picture.
My own Tuesday-morning critique (The Apprentice airs on Monday evenings) always revolves around wondering why the teams, as they approach their assignments each week, never seem to get around to doing much due diligence. Where’s the gathering of competitive intelligence? Why do they persist in thinking that their success has more to do with becoming good pals and liking each other, rather than with figuring out how to accomplish the task in a way that will wow the client? Rather than focusing on how to increase sales? Why in the world on last Monday’s episode did Project Manager Charmaine spend so much of her team’s precious time stocking shelves with product at that Long Island beauty salon, instead of making sure the grand opening was a smashing success?
Can you imagine planning a seminar for a client without really knowing what the client’s business is? Have you ever planned or made revisions to the firm’s web site based simply on your own preferences and “instincts”? Are you getting ready to launch a blog or do podcasts simply because they’re the latest marketing fads? Do you find yourself nodding your head in response to any of these? Well, if so, I hate to say it, but in the words of La Donald: Ms./Mr. Marketer, you’re fired!
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